When He said he wanted to see her before he leaves for his Surgery,She did not even know how to react.He was the man she loved most in her Life,she was the woman he dreamed of.She always thought it was the perfect Love story.Her love, his madness, their commitment , There was nothing she could wish for except his companionship for the rest of her life.
Time had been tough on them both,and she always thought it will end just fine, with them together at the end of the day was all she was concerned about.She did whatever she could have done in her power to fight for her love.Actually she did more then that,and she hoped for things to get better and they never did.He said he was trying and she knew he was and still she felt betrayed when he failed her expectations again and again.
Love is unconditional they say.But sometimes it is not.These are the times when your whole Life depends on one single move by the one you look up to for love, affection and loyalty.You wait and wait and wait with all your zeal and your wishes and your dreams and your prayers pinned on that one single move and then you find out that there is no hope left for you..There is nothing but this shrill and sharp Eco of your unvoiced cries and your unsaid words and unshod tears.So yes she encountered one such time too which left her all strained and shallow, shallow and stuck, stuck in that moment of sheer disappointment.Disappointment that engulfed her heart so tightly that she refused to have any apologies,any answer.
She does not remember for how long she stayed like that,that camouflaged and unmoved.It was not that long but it was powerful enough to shake her whole world upside down.Then Out of her spirits, she arises again, gathers her shattered pieces one by one and sips the pain with due share of bitterness, and then Just a little while ago when she is about to put her broken pieces all together, arrives he again, who still has this impact on her, the impact like a magic spell, a magic spell that makes her forget her injured ,shallow soul.She struggles hard to avoid the impact, tries her shield of self-respect and failed miserably.Yet she tells him that the tale is over, that the princess is no more in that cage, the cruel ,ruthless magician is failed and so is his spells.
He listens to her quietly while his gaze fixed on her the whole time, the gaze that held her a captive all these days,weeks,months and years.. and there she feels the first crack.The shield is of no use,not anymore.It can fight back the betrayal and lies but not that gaze,and yet she finds herself standing in front of him again, with her heart on her palm again and all she could ask him is that, if its her soul that he wants this time!
But its not her soul that he wants, its her time.He said he wants to see her before he leaves for his brain surgery,he wants to see her smiling before he goes for a battle that has very few chances for him.
She does not know how to react, she does not know if she could feel anything anymore,He was dying and all she thought of was her disappointments and failed expectations.
So they say Love is blind, she recalls in her mind..and she could not see this coming,all she thought of was her share of the stakes and her loss and her grief.Then she suddenly recalled how ruthlessly she declared his part of the deal nothing but a deception and betrayal.,Is Love selfish too!?, she wonders,How could she not come up with one excuse of giving him a Benefit of Doubt! How could she deny him her mercy! and they say Love is Patient and kind...she is not sure, she decides, but one thing that she knows about love now is that its Selfish and Cruel and it can truly take the breathes away..
She is stuck into thoughts,in this one moment of realization while he waits for her answer..
(yes then she went to see him, to see him for the one last time,and em too drained to share the details of that meeting this moment.so you guys will have to wait for the next part)